we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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