we have officially lost it.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
