I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
