yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
