I didn't shave. On purpose
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
