Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
