Kiss
Puke
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
