woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
