Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
