The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
