Say something about gay babies.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
