Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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