well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
