obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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