Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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