hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize