just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
