They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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