i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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