He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
