Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
