I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
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