D3 body, D1 cock
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I need to stop coming to work sober
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
