Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
