What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
operation harelip BJ is a go
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Randomize
