I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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