in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
