So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
