I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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