I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
