he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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