I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
