he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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