it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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