Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
