Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
