I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
did i walk over a car last night?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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