So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
