Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
