Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
