I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
vagina is talking i cant
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Randomize
