he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Congratulations! We have a period
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