Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
