i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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