Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
