he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
