plz talk dirty to me
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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