i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
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