Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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