what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
